A guy ,sitting on the driver seat. Another guy sitting beside him. 2nd guy says, yaar bag le aa, tu bhool aya. 1st one says, chod na...kahan gaadi beech me khadi karke jaunga... 2nd one... abe ek min to lagega, le aa na...
1st one.. main nahi la rha.. tu le aa... main jaunga to dikkat ho jayegi...
then the 2nd one says... abe tu dikkat ki vajah se nahi ruka, tu ruka hai ego ki vajah se. (angry he was!) then the 1st one drove the car,didn't bring the bag. Both quiet for a moment.
I was the driver, and ankur khurana was sitting beside me. I don't think he realizes the size(!?) of favor he had just done to me. I kept thinking about this for the whole day. He was so very right!
This was such a small incident. After this, i realized what this ego is.. Almost everywhere, in every conversation, (or rather, argument), it used to come before my eyes, blocked my mind. Everything that was said was just to prevent my ego from getting hurt, like 'searching' for reasons to prove myself right just because i spilled it from my mouth.
Very much in control from my side now, but it still happens. Still I realize after some time... and I don't like that feeling.
Many others too 'suffer' from this. I don't know if they know about this or not. I have met some who know it, but they are still continuing with it. I didn't ask why, (or may be I couldn't, don't remember why). I met one, who says ego honi chahiye, nahi to self respect khatam ho jaati hai. (I still don't understand what self-respect is!) I couldn't understand what he said. And as always, I didn't ask... Tell me if u have the answer...
I was quite happy to find something in me that 'I' hated, and I have the thing quite in control. (I still wonder how can people list out their 'negative' points! seems Meaningless! but i found one though...)
I hope many believe that ego is something that should be eradicated. It causes very much irritation sometimes when somebody is arguing with me, producing illogical logic. More is caused by realizing that I myself irritated somebody :P
1st one.. main nahi la rha.. tu le aa... main jaunga to dikkat ho jayegi...
then the 2nd one says... abe tu dikkat ki vajah se nahi ruka, tu ruka hai ego ki vajah se. (angry he was!) then the 1st one drove the car,didn't bring the bag. Both quiet for a moment.
I was the driver, and ankur khurana was sitting beside me. I don't think he realizes the size(!?) of favor he had just done to me. I kept thinking about this for the whole day. He was so very right!
This was such a small incident. After this, i realized what this ego is.. Almost everywhere, in every conversation, (or rather, argument), it used to come before my eyes, blocked my mind. Everything that was said was just to prevent my ego from getting hurt, like 'searching' for reasons to prove myself right just because i spilled it from my mouth.
Very much in control from my side now, but it still happens. Still I realize after some time... and I don't like that feeling.
Many others too 'suffer' from this. I don't know if they know about this or not. I have met some who know it, but they are still continuing with it. I didn't ask why, (or may be I couldn't, don't remember why). I met one, who says ego honi chahiye, nahi to self respect khatam ho jaati hai. (I still don't understand what self-respect is!) I couldn't understand what he said. And as always, I didn't ask... Tell me if u have the answer...
I was quite happy to find something in me that 'I' hated, and I have the thing quite in control. (I still wonder how can people list out their 'negative' points! seems Meaningless! but i found one though...)
I hope many believe that ego is something that should be eradicated. It causes very much irritation sometimes when somebody is arguing with me, producing illogical logic. More is caused by realizing that I myself irritated somebody :P
nice topic to touch... i got the same feeling a few months back.. there is whole lot of difference between ego and self respect i would say they are completely opposite...
ReplyDeleteegoistic people just want to prove that they are right.... while self respect is standing if u know you are right....
ego says (or have a desire from )others to respect me..
self respect says, don't respect me but you should not disrespect me too....
ego makes you defensive and makes you feel that you are always right...
self respect says you have right to be wrong sometimes :) .... sounds lame but true :P
i would agree to all but this one i suppose...
ReplyDelete"self respect says, don't respect me but you should not disrespect me too..."
i don't think i even understood this..
I am the 'one' who said "ego honi chahiye, nahi to self respect khatam ho jaati hai". And let me explain it better this time.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure you would agree if I say that in the modern society, everyone needs to have a good standing (or a respectable position that makes them a 'suitable candidate' to live among other members of the society). Basically it means justifying your presence among them or might even be interpreted as proving your superiority over them. Now I don't mean to say I like this state of affairs, but that's how it is.
Keeping this background in mind, it is safe to assume that in an individual's mind, the idea of being inferior might creep in quite too often. And that's when his life is almost finished (unless he can get rid of that feeling somehow).
Now is when the idea of self respect comes in. If the individual has respect for himself in 'his own' and only 'his own' eyes, can that person have a chance of having a happy and contented life. His judgement should be made by his own rules and not by the crowd's criterion.
But how often does that happen? Maybe for you its already happening that you respect yourself not judging yourself by what rules has society laid out for you.
Now to sum up all this in one word (two actually :P) would be defining the word 'self respect'.
And what role is played by the 'mighty ego' in this you ask? Now it should be easy as a pie to understand that. By ego, I would mean relentlessly pushing your own self esteem (self esteem is same as self respect, so don't create a hue and cry about that :P) when you lose your path and fall into the endless pit of societal boundations laid out precisely for 'you' to fall into. Once out of that, life would become awesome!
P.S. By ego, I don't mean not getting the bag just because the other person isn't getting it, and you think like "Why should I go if he's not going?". This is just a mutation of the correct-according-to-me definition.
abe yar sirf apni ego ki definition likh deta.. poora essay padhna pad gaya.. theek to hai...
ReplyDeleteof course i agree to the thing ki in the crowd, the only thing someone 'should' say, (or at least i like that) should be the thing that 'he' believes in.
(*Might be same, aur might differ from the crowd.*)
If that is what ego really is, i love to have it.
and i won't say that your ego would be used to get some 'izzat' in the group.. its just about being yourself, and not what the group wants u to be. The 'yourself' might be someone who the group wants, or the group doesn't want.. doesn't matter, or rather shouldn't matter i suppose.
(vaise jo mere wali ego hoti hai phir vo kya hoti hai!?)
Pati nai oye. Maybe that's called attitude. Ajkal to ego usi ko hi bolte hain waise.
ReplyDelete