Respect your Elders

Why? Nobody knows. Just like many of those things, this has also been fed into our brains, from the moment we started understanding any language.
I'll respect somebody if I want to, I'll not respect somebody if I don't want to! 'I' will decide that!

MAYBE:
They want that kids should not argue with them, and don't question anything they say. (Most of the people would want this i think.) So, one generation started feeding this thing into their children, and it has been passed on since then.

'Don't argue with your elders' is another consequence. Kyu bhai? This is much more prevailing than that respect thing. And much more against how a kid would want to live. We depend on talking and discussing and arguing, and we just remove the possibility of arguing from our lives if it is being done with an older person!
(Although usually the older person will turn out to be right in  the argument :P experience you see )

Young do argue with older people, but in the end they have to shut their mouths (even if they are winning :D). Zabaan ladata hai.. badtameez!!

Lying is good sometimes

"Vo jhuth jisse kisi ko khushi mile, vo jhuth jhuth nahi hota".

Suppose you are a painter. You've painted something, and you show it to a friend of yours. You want appreciation of course. And the friend might see it on your face (or may be not, but he knows that you want it). And suppose the friend didn't like the painting. Then what would you want him to say? Just for your happiness, do you want that he should lie and say that the painting is lovely? I think you would want him to be honest and say whatever he feels. (And usually in such cases, friends are honest. They'll say whatever they feel.)

But there are situations when they'll lie. At first you'll like it, but slowly you'll feel that the friend is ever praising, never criticizes. Then it feels that he has been lying. He might be agreeing to whatever you say, or praising you for everything, just to keep a good equation with you or make you happy. Intentions might be not bad, but the method would not produce the desired results.

Suppose you are a fine actor. And you want to pursue it as a profession. Of course it depends on what others think about your acting. You ask somebody, am I good enough? The friend might think, he needs motivation, he wants to go, so I can lie and say yes. Even if he believes the opposite. I think it is something that nobody should do.

If you are such a friend, I don't think that doing it is a good idea. You don't tell the truth to somebody because the truth might hurt, or you lie to somebody because it might make him happy.
Slowly you'll lose trust. If you are doing it with me, I'll never know whether you really mean it or you are just lying once more.Your words might become meaningless to me. Trust lost => friendship lost.

Anger

When we are angry, we say the truth. Whatever it may be. But the problem lies in how we say it.
We are usually rude, and we realize afterwards that we didn't mean to say it that way.

When I am angry, I try to think more, and speak less. It helps, at least helps me.

Happiness is real, When shared.

There was this movie, 'Into the Wild'.  Forced me to accept this truth. Almost two years now.

I am Above

(That song is just because I have stolen the title from this one. This doesn't have anything to do with the post.)

That happiness we feel, when we are feeling proud of ourselves. Isn't that proud feeling only because people admire it? So we feel happy because we did what other people wanted us to do?
I feel proud (only) when I do what I want to, I say what I want to. And I am able to prove myself right on this, i.e., I am able to prove to people that I am right. (Or if somebody else proves me wrong, I feel proud in accepting it :P) And so on, so many reasons.
(I don't think that it is hypocrisy... coz that is what 'I' want, and not what 'others' want..)
But why do I feel proud? Aisa kya ho gaya? And what exactly is this feeling of being proud? Doesn't being better than others at a thing makes you feel proud?
(Here, proud is just the feel good thing. It is not ghamand. Ghamand is totally denied! Completely illogical!)

Chalo,  there might be happiness in being better than others, and that proud feeling, might be a feeling, might not need explanation.

But I have a different problem. I have seen people fight over things, feeling their ego hurt over things, the things for which they are "proved" not to be better than somebody else. It becomes not about being better, but about showing that I am better. Ye kya baat hui! That means that you are trying to be somebody who you are not!  Worst thing ever...

If you are better, you'll be able to prove that you are. If you are not, you know that you are not.. why to prove the opposite! But ego takes over.. what to do... But I think it is a waste of time.

I have done it. As far as I know, I don't do  it now. I sometimes want to do it, but I try to realize what I am doing. And of course, if there might have been times in recent history when I have not realized it, I don't remember.

What is Passion?

There are things that we like doing. What I have seen, is that anything that I am good at, is something I like to do. (12th standard, self experience: So long as I am able to solve my integration questions, I was in love with integration, the moment I couldn't do them, I started getting bored.) But I just like it. The happiness I get from it is that of being able to do it. Its not the happiness of doing it. If it involves people, then it is might be the happiness of being with the people and doing it, or the 'showing' of being better at something, or 'showing' to be able to do it...

But I have seen things that people 'love' 'doing', even if they don't show it to anybody. They really do feel happy. They feel happier when they share this happiness with other people. That happiness is not of 'showing' or 'being better', its just the happiness of sharing your happiness!

And I have also seen this thing, that people love to see other people happy, whether they know them or not (given that former people don't hate he latter people!) If doing something makes somebody happy, then we also love to feel that happiness, through our sense organs. I mean watching, feeling, listening etc.. There are good singers, good dancers, but we don't really like them until they themselves are feeling happy! We might appreciate the talent or the hard-work, but we don't feel happy while watching them.
If we are feeling their happiness, then we might just call that thing their passion!

I used to be confused about passion. That if I am good at something, and I try and keep becoming better at it, it is passion, or ,something is my passion, and since it is passion I keep doing it again and again many times so I become better at it through time... Now I think it is the latter one.

I have seen passionate singers, dancers, talkers, coders and techies (I am not sure of the last two, whether it really is their happiness or not.) I hope to see passions in other art forms too. I also 'guess' I have seen some people who are passionate about power, over other people.

I don't know from where does this happiness come, why does somebody feel happy, but somebody does. And that thing which makes somebody happy again and again, doesn't matter how many times it is done, is Passion. (At least I have reached this conclusion)

Why ethics.

(Selfish,Ethics: Consider the generally prevailing definitions for the word)

What  usually is the reason given for the advice: 'don't be selfish'? Its just 'you shouldn't be selfish', or 'being selfish is bad'.
Why to help others? Coz it is a good thing.
Why give your seat to some old lady in metro? Coz it is good.
Be Honest. It is good.

I think these answers need a bit more explanation or maybe more.
How exactly could these 'good' and 'bad' things have started?
Obviously, if you help others, others will tend to help you, out of returning favor, or to make sure you keep helping the others. That is why it is a good thing. I used to feel bad when people said 'keep helping others, you never know hen you'll need somebody..', now I don't feel bad at all. I do feel good when I help some people,but I am not really sure of 'why'. Is it because I've been taught to feel good, or is it because I really do feel good. (I hope to get the correct answer asap!)

If you think only about yourself, why would anybody want to be with you!?
If you talk to somebody only when you need him (and he doesn't have anything to gain from you) why would he like you? That is why being selfish is a bad thing.

I have heard of people who say something on the face, but believe something completely  opposite! (i think we call them 'hypocrites'). Maybe they praise you on your face,for some uncountable things in you, but in reality hate you, and never tend to show it. That's like a crime! If somebody gets to know this about that hypocite, he is dead! People will stop believing him. That is why it is a bad thing.There is nothing wrong in doing this (just like nothing else is wrong), but it might only be bad for you. Since you hate that somebody, maybe you spill that out in front of somebody, then that somebody gets to know that you are a back-biter.. So your purpose (of, maybe, pretending to be good) fails!

If you are honest with people, those people will believe in whatever you say. They will trust you. There are moments when we feel the urge to lie, but that one lie might ruin the trust forever. Control yourself for that moment, and be honest. That helps in the future. (merko to accha bhi lagta hai, I don't know why. ) So you are being selfish.. but in a sense for which people won't hate you. That's why honesty is known as the best policy.
I also follow it. I have been doing it unknowingly since my childhood (age<=17) , and it always felt good. Now I also have some reasons. So feels better.

Save environment. That is for you! You will get better place to live in! That's why save water, electricity and stuff.
Donate blood. All ads which wanted us to donate blood always only told us to do it. There is this ad that came a few months before, it said 'Donate blood, kyunki accha lagta hai!' That's fine with me. You donate blood, ask everybody else to donate blood, that donated blood might just help you someday! (It is not because you are getting back the results of doing a 'good thing'!!)

Ye sab 'acchi aadatein' tabhi humare maa baap sikhate hain. Somebody might have started it, others might have followed. Maybe, slowly the reasons started fading away, and what remained was just 'good' and 'bad'. As a child, we were not allowed to question our elders. I expect that even they don't care about the reasons.
But now I think we should know why we are following some principles. In this context of ethics, the answer of  'why' (at least for me), is that we are selfish.
Or may be, as Ayn Rand says, some people wanted us to feel guilty, so as to gain power over us, so that we always look up to them for justification of everything... This explanation did come as a shock to me when I read The Fountainhead, but it does seem to be a correct explanation. And a bit too convincingly stated in the book. (That was in fact my favorite part!)

Similar explanations follow for murders, rapes, terrorism, child abuse and other stuff..

We  tend to forget these ethics when we really are in trouble, and then feel guilty. I don't think there is anything that should make anybody feel guilty... you just made it bad for yourself!

Phattu..in general...

Bravery-a virtue... why do we want to be the brave guy? Anyone comes and calls you a coward, you  feel bad.. why is that! What's the problem? Why does it feel so...derogatory?
And what exactly defines being a coward?
Sometimes, when we do the 'different' things,things that we want to do (or we are made to want to do them) we are called courageous. Else, Phattu.
Or sometimes the things we do not want to do, but we are forced to do them, in the name of something, and then if we do it, we are the daring, else, Phattu.

And of course, it should not be that everybody else is also doing those things. If many others are also doing those things, then we are not courageous because it is too common, right. We won't need to overcome any fear,or peer pressure to do those things.
And also, other people should want me to do those things. This is the main concern. Or else there won't be anybody to praise us..
If I commit a theft,or a murder, or a rape, then am I the courageous guy? No? But everybody doesn't do these things, and I am quite afraid before and while doing these things, and thus I am overcoming my fears, then am I not the courageous guy? Still I'm not! That is because I didn't do what you wanted me to do, right!?

You are a liar => you are a coward. (I devoted a whole post for this!)
You fight for your country => You're the man!
You run away from fights => Phattu
Ye kya baat hui yaar

You might just like/admire a person who you are calling the man, but let him be free, why to put a burden on him, that continue doing what you did, you're the man!
Similarly, hate somebody who is a liar, don't let him come near you,why insult him? Let him do what he likes to!
And why do you feel insulted if somebody calls you a phattu?

Looking closely, being a phattu is also somewhat courageous. Knowing that if I am being a coward, the whole world will despise me, insult me, but even then if I am being a coward.... I am being courageous.. (ye to bakwaas sa kuch ho gaya!)

Some people can even be manipulated using these words.. Just call him a phattu at something, and he will do anything you are asking him to.. given that he doesn't use his brain.

Heard somewhere: Conscience is for Cowards.
I would say, Conscience is for idiots(that's rude!, but I might also be one of these idiots). What is conscience? Whatever the 'intelligent' people have put in our minds, is usually referred to as conscience, or at least that is what I have found. So no cowardice involved here. (although I don't even know what is a coward!)
Pity is for weak. What is a weak?

Bravery might be praised, but I don't think it is the thing anybody should try to have, just because others want. And if you like being praised, and you are ready to be, to some extent, controlled by them, you can try being the brave one. I wouldn't mind. (As if you care!)

Pity

'Bechara Baccha, Hansne  Khelne ke Dino me Bheekh Maang rha hai'

What exactly are you doing? Who wants you to say that? The beggar boy doesn't want it. He wants money. For whom are you saying this? For your own self. I don't understand from where did this concept come from. We feel bad for beggars, because we think that we have more, and the beggar has less, that he got less opportunities. This is no reason. That is how the life is. Survival of the fittest. Why should we feel guilty for things we have got, the things that somebody else wants but doesn't have!
Oh! The Beggar has no money, he can't eat, how will he survive in this cruel world? By saying this, you are just satisfying yourself. But I can't understand what's getting satisfied.

If you really feel happy in seeing others happy, what you can do is give them money. Pity is the thing you might need to explain, at least to me. You might also want to send that little child to school. Do it, if it makes you happy. Don't do it if you have been made to feel happy.

You have your own problems in your life, the beggar has his own. If he doesn't know how to live, how to earn, he will die!(Please don't hate me for saying this :P) What's your problem? Why do you give him money? (or if you show pity, and don't give him the money, why don't you?) That money is just making you happy, but for the beggar you are just another bakra. He thanks you, because he wants that you shouldn't stop giving him the money. They invented dua for satisfying people, keeping them happy, or satisfying their ego, and getting money from them. Although nobody minds because everybody becomes happy :D

Take the handicaps. Without a hand, or a leg. Is pity the thing that they want? Why to treat them differently? Why to start trying to help him when he comes in front of you? I don't think he would want that. Everybody wants to be self-sufficient. Almost everybody can take care of himself.What he might want, is acceptance, as far as I believe.But if we care for he wants acceptance, then he is never getting it from us.(That was an important sentence) Being handicap is nothing different. Just a bit more difficult life, than with the leg or the hand.

Why show pity only to the poor and the beggars? Show it to me, to everybody in this world, who has something less than what you have! If somebody has enough money to live, or has every body part well sustained, this doesn't mean that he is happy enough... And it might be that that beggar is much happier than you are. (might not be content though)

We also pity animals. right? We give milk to stray dogs, bechara bhookha hai. The dog then wags its tail whenever it sees you again, for he wants the milk again.. vo bhi to harami(as generally defined) hi hai... (hamari tarah...)
If you can give food to that dog, and you don't give food or money to a beggar, maybe almost dying on the street, you might need to explain.
Some people say, ki khaane ke liye paise maang rha hai daaru me uda dega. Why does it matter to you? Can you decide what will make that man happy? or are you only concerned about the fact that he must have only food using the money that you give him? So, in a way, his happiness doesn't matter to you, but yours does...? And I take it as a fact.. that its your happiness that matters to you, whether you admit it or not, to yourself or the world. So if you are really interested in seeing others happy, please buy him a bottle of whiskey, and you'll see the happiest man on earth!
But if you are giving him the food instead, I think, and hope, by now you might have realized that its only you who is getting satisfied. So why get satisfied in lending your, or your dad's hard earned money to a person, who is just taking it!
PS: I expect some disagreements on this topic. Plz tell me something I could not think of.

Faith

"Leap, and the net will appear." - Julie Cameron  (Idiot)

Faith. Where does it come from?

Have faith. Good will happen to  you. Laxmi barsegi ek din etc. If you agree, shit.
Having faith in what/who?
If you have faith in yourself, that what you are doing might lead to something that you want to happen, this is fine for me. You are having that faith for some particular reasons, not merely because it should make you happy.
I can have faith in some people, that I trust somebody. Not just like that, only because of the past record. If somebody has been honest, I'll have faith that he might turn out to be honest the next time too. And if the person had been a liar, I might have faith that he will be lying again!

So we can have faith for living beings, not in things. how can I have faith in destiny(whats that?)? in God?
Faith in god is idiotic, even if you believe that god exists. Even if we assume that god exists, and it exists till now, how can you say that it is watching everything happening around the world and thinking that it will also someday do something for you!

And Do Good, Good will happen to you. Have faith :D
Firstly, 'Good' is undefined. Just because some people said that something is good, we are doing things. Others define or have defined it for us. Good is usually something that 'other ppl' like. Obviously, if you do the things that others likes, people will like you, and you might be able to get things done easily. So good is happening to u.


(Or maybe you like the feeling when you help others, but make sure that it is not because of the mindwash done one you when you were a kid. ('you' doesn't mean it is you :P))
But there is no guarantee, that it will happen. Anything can happen to you, depends on the situations, and your talent too.
And its not that somebody is watching you from the sky, that if you do any of those things mentioned in some list, you get extra points, and now you will be happier.

That would surely have been said by some geniuses/idiots to some people,  to make them happy or to gain power, and those people believed it. But they also passed this to their children... to us...

Sach nahi bolta? Phattu.

Honesty. Is it the best policy?

The reason why many(many = all I have known) people believe in speaking truth is because they want people to believe them. To not question anything they say. This gives satisfaction, and ease of life. If somebody is known to be a liar, then of course no value would be given to what  he says! When you are honest, you don't have to remember things, I mean the lies you say, you have to remember them, right. And if there is even one loophole, the lie is destroyed.
That is why I believe in speaking the truth (most of the times) or rather stay quiet.
(If somebody is forcing me to speak when I know I won't be saying what's true, I usually say something, and let the person know that it is a lie. This usually shuts his mouth :P)
Perfect lies are rare. But if it is a situation in which nobody has any chance of knowing the truth, even(!) I might lie.
I haven't seen a more truthful (more truthful? ye kaisi english hai?) person than myself. Maybe I haven't met many people. And I am not proud of this characteristic(not quality) . And I am not un-proud(!) too! I do it for my own sake.
Lastly, Speaking Truth in any case is not a virtue, Lying is not a vice. Truth is something that everybody wants to hear, so they love they people who are truthful. They admire him. That is why everybody says you should be honest, because that makes people happy, and in turn might make you happier!

This is not me, iski baat to sun lo

Just listen to that old guy in white long beard. Starts after 50 sec. That guy talks logic. His name is Jaggi Vasudev and popularly known as Sadhguru.
I am writing a few sentences on which I want to emphasize. But I would prefer that you watch the video first.

00.01.01
Everything that you do not know, has the basic humility to see that I do not know. Only when you say I do not know, there is a possibility of knowing it.

00.01.38
The fight in the world is not between good in evil, it is always between one man's belief verses another man's belief. The moment you believe something that is not a living experience for you, you are already in conflict with somebody else who believes something else.

The part after 00.03.22, I couldn't understand that. Or rather I found it an 'assumption'.

And some other people are also talking in the video. Either I couldn't understand what they were saying (due to unknown accent or knowledge), and the parts that I did understand, I found them crap (strong word to use!).

The best ones

(better ones marked with *)

*"Too often we... enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought"-JFK"*

If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry
lot indeed.


"The true meaning of life is to plant trees, under whose shade u do not expect to sit." Nelson Henderson

Pursooku'n( peaceful) lagti hai kitni jheel ke paani pe but( swan) /pairo'n ki betaabiya'n paani
ke ander dekhiye.

*Our desire to seek the truth is a lot weaker than our desire to tell ourselves what we want to
hear,to perpetuate our own beliefs!*


Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.


"No one can be good for long when goodness is not in demand.":) Bertolt Brecht.


"It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit." - Harry S Truman


How wise,nice and selfless some people sound but when it come to their narrow interest they show
their real self.ugly petty and selfish

"Self-knowledge comes from knowing other men." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe


If you think you can do a thing or think you can't do a thing, you're right. ~ Henry Ford


Just like a child who does not want to give up a comfort blanket .We hold on to our beliefs
because they help us cope with the fear of death

It is all about counting heads. The more people you can rally onto your side the more "powerful"
you become.

"I never change, I simply become more myself." - Joyce Carol Oates


*Our desire to be accepted prevents us from doing what is "right".*


The lust for fame is the last that a wise man shakes off. Even those who write against fame do
not hesitate to attach their name to it.

"The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of
doubt." - Bertrand Russell


"If people knew how hard I had to work to gain my mastery, it would not seem so wonderful at
all." - Michelangelo  (fastest guitarist)


"There are people who have money and people who are rich." - Coco Chanel

"It is not in the pursuit of happiness that we find fulfillment, it is in the happiness of
pursuit." - Denis Waitley


"A friend to all is a friend to none." - Aristotle


Wit of the Day: "Future scene: Abhishek to Amitabh : daddy daddy baby bilkul mujhpe gya hai...:)
^_^ Amitabh: OH shit!! :-/" - Aman Garg


akbar ne birbal se aisa likhne ko kaha,jise khushi main padhein to gum ho aur gum main khushi.usne likha"ye waqt guzar jaayega " ;)


Ek roti koi nhi de ska us masoom ko Lekin,Wo tasveer lakho me bik gayi Jisme roti k bgair wo

baccha udaas baitha tha..!


*I torture you to take the torture out of me!*

*Fear is the father of faith just as hope is the mother of fear.*


"Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something." -Plato

*If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.*

*Don't listen to your heart, cuz that's actually your brain, disguised as your heart! Listen to your brain, which is actually your heart!*

"You must first be who you are, then do what you need to do, in order to have what you want." -- Margaret Young

And the best one.. by freddie mercury (Queen Band)
*Nothing really matters.... Anyway the wind blows...*
(i.e. nothing really matters.. kuch bhi karlo... hawa to behti rahegi...)

Why Reason (sounds strange :P)

(If you don't get why the title should sound strange.. that is because I am going to give reasons for why we should value reason!)
----x-------------------x----------------------x--------------------
The first thing I would like to clarify would be why is 'why' not meaningless, why is reason not baseless.
(That is because I really have seen somebody saying this!!)
If anybody considers reason as baseless, this would mean that according to him arguments and discussions can't really exist, because we can end all discussions by saying that 'reason itself is baseless so why to discuss'. Discussion implies that we are going to use reason.
One more,
When I use this sentence (reason=baseless), this means that I am actually giving a 'reason'! A reason to prove my point, that since reason is baseless, I win and we have to stop talking about it.
So, if reason is baseless, then we all should just shut up and sit at our homes, not talk.
But you didn't do that, right? You just said that 'reason is baseless'! Contradiction.
But since I have used reason to prove that you are actually making a contradiction, according to you all this would be baseless. You win.
----x-------------------x----------------------x--------------------

Now what is reason. I would say, that it is a statement, which is when dug up even deeper, we lead to a premise. And a premise is something which is true. (or rather assumed to be true.. which might make reason baseless..).

Now, the only premise that exists according to me is  "I want ____". Fill anything in that blank. Every reason that I give leads to this.
I believe this because I have found reasons for everything I believe, but not for this particular sentence which I am calling as a premise.... All the arguments that I make, sab khod khaad ke yaheen pahunchta hai.
I also think (but I don't believe it as of now) that a reason for this sentence does not, and cannot exist. That this is the thing for which we are living, that we want to do the things that we want to do. May it be being a rapist or may it be being a soldier.

----x------Some more explanation, if required----x-----
When I say I want something and want to dig out reasons for that, all I get are some other I want's. And then some more I want's again. Recursion you see. But it always ends on one I want something. Last wale I want ka reason kabhi nahi mila mujhe. Sochke lagta hai ki milega bhi kaise. Tumko mile to batana.
----x------Some more explanation, if required----x-----

One more thing. Say a discussion is going on. What I believe is that more than on person can't be correct. An ideal discussion will lead to a unanimous conclusion. Why?
Firstly, I think discussion can't take place if everybody doesn't follow the same set of premises. Because then there won't be any point of discussing stuff. If we are arguing whether drinking is right or wrong, all of the participants have to have belief in some particular, and common set of premises. For example, if all of us believe that 'harming somebody else's life is not a good thing' then, and ONLY then, we can make the argument 'Drinking is bad because after drinking you might fight and kill somebody'. or else this can't be said. And if this argument is valid, and there is somebody who doesn't agree to 'drinking is bad' , then that somebody is actually making a contradiction. because he is violating a premise.
If some people believe in that premise and some people don't, then the argument will be accepted by some people only. Then it would be a deadlock I suppose. No points to make after that. Discussion ends.
(It all actually works according to the books!)
(But disagreement might occur where GD is about predicting something.. like violence vs non-violence to reach freedom, or should we take up this project or that project for the success of a company. all this is hypothetical.)

What my problem is?
Whenever we say something for which we can't find an argument, we say that 'reasons do not exist for some things'.(when I say 'we', it doesn't include me)  Why is that? If you can't find a reason, don't believe it.. until you find one! Realize that you use reasons in every discussion you do. When you discuss something with somebody, you want to win by reason, you want to prove yourself right by using some set of premises. Why not discuss someday with yourself? Why to let somebody's imagination become your belief?

Aji log kya kahenge...

"I don't care about what people think..."
I do.
Many people say this sentence just like that.. just because they think, or are made to think, that it 'should' be this way.. that we 'should' not care about what others think about us... and they keep on repeating this sentence in several manners, at several places..seems it is just because they want others to know that they don't care about what others think!
(when i say 'many people',  I would like to clarify that I have have met only a few people in my life, and so I could be wrong on this.)
But still, its not that everybody's opinion matters to me, and its not that whatever I do is affected by other people..

I want people to know the 'correct' things about me. If some body likes me because I am free of ego, or if somebody hates me because I am a back-biter  (i don't know why these examples came up in my mind!), I would mind. I would want to clarify things, to let that somebody know that he likes/hates me for the wrong reasons. And that 'somebody' would usually be somebody I don't know, somebody I know and like/not-hate, and sometimes even somebody I hate.

When I am talking, I try to make sure I say what I believe, and not what somebody wants to hear from me. I try not to praise just because that might make somebody happy, or i don't criticize without proper reasons. I try not to say what could be the best possible option to say at that particular moment, and now I also try not to stick to one particular thought just because I said it an hour, or a week before. And I try not to change what I said a week before just like that. Only when I have reasons, which I will admit of course.
I try not to talk opposite of what a group of people is saying just because i think i should (might feel good :P), and I don't tend to agree just because I think I should. I do it only if I have enough reasons.

And I also think that it should be this way, although i don't have any right to say this.
So do what 'you' want, anything I mean. You want to send your parents to old-age homes or you want to start an NGO.. just do it, and stand by it.

If somebody hates me for a characteristic of mine which I consider as fine, then I can't do anything about that. And then comes the time when I can say that I don't really care about why somebody hates me.

I

"Selfishness is a sin"...
"Altruism is a virtue"...
if Yes.. read...
Why do u believe in either of these statements? selfish hona buri baat hai kya? If someone is doing everything for himself, what's your problem? Your problem comes when he does it in front of u or 'you' are involved in his act.

Now why do you call being selfish a bad thing.. i think that's because u want people to be good to you right? If somebody doesn't care about you while he is thinking of his well being, why will you like him? That is what i think is our (or rather 'my') sole reason for hating the selfish people. And it is justified.
Nobody can stop me from hating somebody. But I can't say that the stuff that he is doing is 'wrong'.
Now when i am hating somebody while calling him 'selfish', am 'I' not being selfish? coz i want 'him' to be good to me... in every situation...
That is how it works... if i am good to people... only then people will be good to  me.. nahi?
*So while I am hating somebody for being selfish, that is because 'I' am selfish.*

That was for the general definitions of selfishness.
Now for 'my' definition of selfishness, which I think 'should' be the definition. Please let me know if you  differ.

Everybody wants to do what he likes. U, me , everybody. That's what we call 'living' right? Everybody wants to see 'himself' content in every possible way. That's why I say, everybody is selfish, whether he admits it or not (to himself or to others).
Somebody giving something to a beggar.. (imagine a small kid..)
1) Thinking that he will go to heaven by doing this.. ki vo punya kama rha hai.. in this case anybody would agree that it is selfishness as generally defined.
2) Thinking that it will make the beggar happy.. and that gives 'him' the pleasure. That is generally not called selfishness.. but it is.. in my eyes.
Its just  that 2nd option  is generally considered as virtue, while it is not. (and i think nothing is)

Every action that is performed by anybody seems selfishness to me.. and properly justified.. and as nothing wrong. Being selfish is what life is. If its for the well being of others it is not considered selfishness. If you don't want to define it that way, it is fine, but why to call it a virtue? (anyway, what is a virtue?) and why to call selfishness a sin?

deshbhakti!

Anna Hazare nahin, hazaaron hain! - Gulzaar
masha allah kya baat kahi hai... But...

Anna hazare says that he has given his life to people, he LIVES for the well being of OTHER ppl!! Whats that!?
He says that he didn't have a reason to live, and he wanted to commit suicide, but he got inspired by the life of swami Vivekananda..the thing that the purpose of life is to serve others. Seems crap... Why would, and why should, i give my life for somebody else!
But dekha jaye to he feels happy by serving others. He is working to remove corruption, and that makes ME happy. Aur kya chahiye? I  wud want to say that he is an idiot if he says that he is living to serve others. (But Shit, the 'others' includes me too! )
Deshbhakti... thats the word used everywhere. The feelings of deshbhakti are fed into the brains of almost everybody i know!

"You should love your country!" - this sentence is believed to be a premise, but it is not! (thanks to Atlas Shrugged for giving me the word- premise) Say I try to export some arms to pakistani terrorists, (i won't, can't, do that!), you would hate me... why is that? u would say ' tu gaddar hai... !" just because for u it is a PREMISE! something that is 'true'! But kaun bola bhai? Being called a gaddar brings a feeling of guilt...(just because some people who wanted power over us..they make us feel guilty.. this thought came from The Fountainhead, copied as it is, and convinced to the fullest)

Sabse jyada to bewkoof sainiko(soldiers u know..) ko banaya jaata hai yaar... saara din yahi baat phoonkte rehte hain ki love ur country, die for ur country, sarhad pe jaan doge to jannat (!?) naseeb hogi... fakr ki baat hai sarhad pe jaan dena.. kyu bhai? This also becomes the reason for somebody to join the army! goli khaake aata hai koi soldier to ghamand karta hai...or at least feels proud...  can't understand this... if u die.. the game's over... then it might be nothing my friend..

Hum bhi kum bewkoof nahi banate unka.. We say that soldiers should get more salary.. they should be able to meet their expenses ....salaam thokte hain unhe...bas unme hawa bharne ke liye.. why? because we do not want to do the things that they are doing! they are protecting us! without caring for their lives.. aur hum unme hawa bharte hain ki jaao lado.. jaan de do.. par hamari jaan na jaane paye...
But even then, soldiers are happy for what they are doing. So nothing else matters. My only problem is , that i don't want anybody, to make anybody else WANT to die at the border. If it is their own choice, which i think will never be unless anybody else does some brainwashing, then if he wants to give his life for me, then who would be happier than me?

e...go...

A guy ,sitting on the driver seat. Another guy sitting beside him. 2nd guy says, yaar bag le aa, tu bhool aya. 1st one says, chod na...kahan gaadi beech me khadi karke jaunga... 2nd one... abe ek min to lagega, le aa na...
1st one.. main nahi la rha.. tu le aa... main jaunga to dikkat ho jayegi...

then the 2nd one says... abe tu dikkat ki vajah se nahi ruka, tu ruka hai ego ki vajah se. (angry he was!) then the 1st one drove the car,didn't bring the bag. Both quiet for a moment.

I was the driver, and ankur khurana was sitting beside me. I don't think he realizes the size(!?) of favor he had just done to me. I kept thinking about this for the whole day. He was so very right!
This was such a small incident. After this, i realized what this ego is.. Almost everywhere, in every conversation, (or rather, argument), it used to come before my eyes, blocked my mind. Everything that was said was just to prevent my ego from getting hurt, like 'searching' for reasons to prove myself right just because i spilled it from my mouth.
Very much in control from my side now, but it still happens. Still I realize after some time... and I don't like that feeling.
Many others too 'suffer' from this. I don't know if they know about this or not. I have met some who know it, but they are still continuing with it. I didn't ask why, (or may be I couldn't, don't remember why). I met one, who says ego honi chahiye, nahi to self respect khatam ho jaati hai. (I still don't understand what self-respect is!) I couldn't understand what he said. And as always, I didn't ask... Tell me if u have the answer...

I was quite happy to find something in me that 'I' hated, and I have the thing quite in control. (I still wonder how can people list out their 'negative' points! seems Meaningless! but i found one though...)


I hope many believe that ego is something that should be eradicated. It causes very much irritation sometimes when somebody is arguing with me, producing illogical logic. More is caused by realizing that I myself irritated somebody :P

destiny?

maktub!! (for those of have read the Alchemist) i.e. , its written, you can't change it. What has happened had been written in your destiny long ago, its written on your hands, on your forehead, and nobody knows where else! Its destiny!
Once again... Why??
Why do we say its destiny? Why has it been decided long ago?And who decided it? (of course God!... who?) But even if it is decided, how do you know it?
See its simple probability. You toss a coin, their are 50% chances each for head and tail. This doesn't need formal education, an illiterate (as defined by constitution) can see that its true.We can bias this coin, but putting some weight or something (that might require some literacy!) , so that there is 75% chance for head and 25% for tail.But still, it doesn't ensure that only head will come, there is also some probability for tail.

That's what it is in life that i see, everything is a probability. Agar gaadi 50kmph pe chal rahi hai to kuch chances hain accident hone ke, aur kuch chances hain nahi hone ke. Agar speed 120 kar di, to accident hone ke chances badhe hain (i hope u can see all the reasons for that..). This also doesn't mean ki accident ho hi jaayega. Aur agar ho gaya to kuch chances hain ki maroge, aur kuch chances honge ki bach jaaoge. (ye to conditions pe depend karega na..).
Bas agar accident ho gaya, to ye kyu kehte hain ki yaar kismat me likha tha.. ye kya baat hui. agar 50 ki speed pe hua tab especially yahi kaha jaata hai.
some think "accident hona hoga to 50 pe bhi ho jaayega, main to 120 pe chalunga". Ye sochke 120 pe chala rhe ho to yaar bewkoofi hai, because probability of accident to badh rahi hai... mar jaaoge! Agar ye pata hai ki chances badh rahe hain, aur mastibaaji me chala rhe ho, then i don't mind, because that's one's own choice :)

Ek aur cheez hoti hai, luck. Bad luck, good luck. Accident hua, Mera pair toot gaya, bad luck. Nahi toota, to good luck. We are defining luck as if it has been predetermined, par ye vo cheez hai jiska control hamare haath me nahi hota. It is almost impossible to 'bias' somethings.
If luck is defined for things that are not in our hands, and it is not said that it has been set by God or somebody... i don't mind.

death... why...why not...

/*I thought about this, but never thought about writing on this until i read this post on anurag gulati's blog (http://anythingcanhappenwhenyouareme.blogspot.com/2011/04/death-it-is-not-maybe-that-bad.html).*/

It might come to someone's mind (has come to some minds....) to just end it...  just end the life... be far away fom all the 'suffering' that is happening...or if someone dies, somebody else could say that the guy has gone to peace... forever... a long sleep.. its the best for him... seems totally incorrect to me.

somebody might believe in after life, but there is no reason to believe so. Just one more imagination from somebody's brain gone to become the belief of others. May be something is there, but u can't know it before dying! And after dying, there might be NOTHING! and  this is what i believe, that dying is the stoppage of everything in your body and nothing else. Death would not be freedom in any way, it will be nothingness...i mean it wont be anything... if i die... this means i am deleted.. nothing else...
I enjoy being on earth, being alive... and i want to be so... just like everybody but some...
If i want to commit suicide, just when i am about to jump, if i would just come back and wait for some days.. i think i would get new reasons to live... and i would do the opposite of repenting... (can't remember the right word!)

I heard a woman, saying that presence of somebody on earth is merely sufferings that somebody has to go through... Death is the best thing for somebody.. we should be happy if somebody dies because he is now free from everything... (She seemed to be a fan of OSHO.. i.e. rajneesh)
Now is there any reason that u can figure out for such belief? though i couldnt talk to her, i still think she had gone wrong somewhere. Just to remove the fear of death, someone had washed her brain... but i can't tell for sure because i dont know exactly what she meant...


I want to die satisfied, satisfied just when i move to my deathbed and not before that... all possible wishes of mine fulfilled... thats the best thing that could happen for me, not death.

whats right, whats wrong...

people 'should' be good, people 'should' respect their elders,people 'should' not indulge in any crime... and worst of all , people shouldn't be selfish..!
and so on...

'should' aur 'chahiye' jaise words ko to dimaag se nikal ke phaink dena 'chahiye'!!

what i want to say is, that how can anybody define what is right, what is wrong, what somebody should do, how somebody should think... ? will you define? are you seth?
(most of it is (as far as my brain says) linked to religion or god.)

take for example corruption. people take bribes, because they want to take it, and it is within their reach. I have seen people earning from bribes, and they spend some part of that money in 'good' things, like feeding the poor, donating and all.
not because they want any welfare of these people, but because they want their own satisfaction ki rishwat lene se 'paap' na lage.
Yaar karna hai to karo, and that too with very much clear conscience. No need to feel bad.
But Its our right that we stop you from doing this, to criticize you, and we will!!
(same is true for u too i suppose)

there are many who always keep on criticizing corruptions and all, but all signs of corruption are visible in them even at this stage... (i mean college me..)

These rights and wrongs are nothing but some things fed into our brains since our birth. (just like 'god'). If if at the age of five, you had been adopted by some terrorist, then u would have called terrorism as the best thing that happened to u! thats only because the stuff that now goes into your brains is different...
now you say that terrorists are wrong, then u would have said that people are wrong, jihaad vihaad ke liye lado.. allah naseeb hoga..
this way i think Everything, terrorism, murders , rapes etc... , everything can be justified.

i am not supporting them, mere saamne koi rapist aa gaya to main goli maar doon saale ko... but why would i? thats because of the surroundings i have been brought up in, thats what my parents, my school, movies, newspapers and so on have fed into my brain! Thats how my conscience has been built up.
would shooting such person would be right? i can kill him just because 'i' think raping is wrong?

I do what my conscience allows me to do... that can be anything... daan punya ya murder vurder... and conscience changes with time... today i might do stuff which i couldn't even think of some years back... Its all about being happy.

choti cheez lete hain...
kabhi kisi shopkeeper ko paise dena bhool gaye, you know u have not given the money, but the shopkeeper has forgotten it. Will you go and return the money? i do it (and by now you know why!) What if
somebody doesnt? is it 'wrong'? kisi ke dimmag me aa sakta hai ki shopkeeper is satisfied that he has made profit, so now i can keep the money. both satisfied, both happy, whats wrong?
and i don't mind at all!
but that will develop (some hate or may be disrespect) in me for that person... even more hate if he keeps preaching of the 'good' stuff and does this afterwards...


but we are selfish people, we want everybody to be like we want them to be, so we'll oppose corruption, we'll oppose terrorism...
But we have some laws... seedhe jaake jaan se to nahi maar sakte na... case vase karna padta hai...

also i think that laws have been built up keeping one thing in mind, that 'somebody' doesnt have any right over the life of 'somebody else'. and i find this quite justified. We've not been given the right to decide whats right or whats wrong. It all works according to the rule books.
(Thats also what i believe, and my conscience works on this principle only... equal opportunity for everybody... 'including me')

PS: please stop giving advice until asked for... nobody likes taking advise, everybody gives it, as if it is the best thing that is happening for the advice taker!
(although i havent seen many people doing this, but i have seen some.)

aasheerwaad

blessings of elders... badon ke pair chuo.. aasheerwaad milega... i dont know why we believe in this..

bachpan se hi logon ko sikhaaya jaata hai ki badon ke pair chuo, take their blessings, marks acche aayenge, u'll be successful... give money to beggars u'll get their blessings... some give chappatis to dogs and cows(gau maata!!!)... punya milega... agla janam bhi accha ho jaayega abhi se!! :D

i don't like this in the first place because it simply makes everybody selfish from the start. Har kaam bas apne liye karo , touch the feet not out of respect, but out of selfishness. and When we grow up, we say 'i dont like selfish ppl.'...

and u'll say that u do it out of respect, bol lo...

i also do it , just to 'show' that i respect them. Karta hun ya nahi vo to bas mujhe pata hai...

Agar sachin century maarta hai, ground me standing ovation milti hai, agar tv pe dekh rahe hain to bhi khade hote hain, lekin tabhi ,jab aur log bhi baithe hon.
ground me sachin ko dikhaane ke liye, aur tv ke saamne logon ko dikhaane ke liye. Agar akele baithe ho to koi khada nahi hoga.
similar case is with touching the feet of elders, whether u respect them or not, u show that u do.

accha, vo sab to theek hai, but why do u believe that blessings jaisi cheez exists karti hai!!!??
kyunki mummy kehti hai :D

i think ki logon ne dekha hoga ki bacche haath se nikalte jaa rahe hain, boodha hote hi chod dete hain, to blessings jaisi cheez nikaal do, bacche dhang se baat karte rahenge.
it seems to me that this is the reason for the 'invention' (not discovery) of blessings... if u have a better one, do tell me.

GOD- yes or no?

/* dont mind my language, or arrangement of content, i m not trying to show my writing skills. */


Most of us believe, or may be "know" , that something or someone called as god exists. The reason for that (as i see it) is our parents and others called as elders. Have you ever thought of this before? I have asked this to very few people, and i am not satisfied with their answers.
"why do you believe that GOD exists?"

Q. who created the universe?
A. GOD
why?

Some say "har baat ka reason nahi hota yaar". This sentence is used only when we want to believe something, but there is no reason for that. Whenever we talk, we try to explain ourselves with the support of reasons and logic. Then why not here?
'If believing something makes me happy, then i shall believe it.' If that's the reason you give, that you are ready to admit that you can lie to yourself and be happy, then this is acceptable to me.

If somebody believes that "kainchi chalane se ghar me ladai hoti hai" , then we call it a superstition, because it seems illogical. the same way, your belief in god seems superstition to me.

Say u believe in god, but then why do you go to temples to pray? and you have already assumed that god is a person. why is that? And you are requesting him/her for the things that you desire, for which i dont see any reason. Some say that they go only to 'thank' god. Why do u have to go to temple for that if god is everywhere? and why is god everywhere!? just like that? just because mummy kehti hai? pandit jee kehte hain?

if you think God is energy, then are you praying to , or thanking this energy!?
if you think god is some "thing" , then it's better, but still why? why can't we say "i don't know." !?

Some people pray to Hanuman (on tuesday), some to ganesha and so on.
These are characters from the mythological( i dont know whats that) 'novels' and not the gods. Even if you think that they have got great character or persona, then you can respect them or follow them, how can you pray to them !?

muslims pray to allah, hindus to many, christens to christ, and even then GOD is one, and nobody knows who/what , and even then we want to believe that he/it exists.
All these gods seem to be born out of ego. That community has a god, we will also have one. Take India, thousands of gods for thousands of communities, but still God is one :D. More population, so more caretakers required for handling \m/

"main hanuman ji ko bahut maanta hoon kyunki tuesday ko kuch aisa hua tha ki..."
if u have ever said such a thing, think what you just did. You probably believe that Hanuman has been assigned the task to take care of you :D
=> Agar tuesday ko meri kaamnayein poori honi band ho gayi to i'll shift to some other god. My caretaker has been changed :D

upar swarg hai neeche nark hai. Agar acche karm karoonga to swarg me, nahi to narak me. what is this shit!! swarg me apsarayein hain, nark me rakshas! arre kyun bhai!! tumne kuch dekha hai kya kabhi?
ye batao ki acche karm hote kya hain... ye kaun define karega. tum karoge? kyun bhai. Tum seth ho kya!
Jis kaam se kisi doosre insaan ko haani na pahunche, kisi ka bhala ho, vo accha karm hai. kyun?
this is just the point of view, different ppl, different perspectives.
And belief is not a perspective.

If you believe in god, u must believe in ghosts.If you dont , think why. That might be because you dont want to believe it.

Some ppl see God in their dreams, telling them something, some people have seen ghosts. maine kyun nahi dekhe bhai?
you have seen something => you believe in it
but here,
you believe in something => you see it!!

what else... if you have any arguments, please post them here.
//added on 23/7/11
Fire helped to cook food, and it can also burn u. helpful, and dangerous
=> fire= god
Water is to be drunk, it can drown u,helpful, and dangerous
=> water =god
Cow gives milk
=>cow=god
and so on... but this is only in india i suppose.. what say...

(the following stuff is hypothetical... obviously!)
Ek din bhagwaan naam ka shabd invent kiya gaya... they taught people to worship 'him', so that he could fulfill their wishes... to saare log baith gaye honge pooja karne saare kaam vaam chodke...
Obviously, results would not have been as expected! Kaam karne chodoge to kaise jiyoge guru..
Phir ek nayi kahawat ka janm hua... 'bhagwaan usi ki madad karta hai jo khud apni madad karta hai'... waah ji waah...creating new premise according to needs...